His Only
by TravellerMK
Summary: When we were younger, he would whisper sweet promises into my ear as we lay under the moonless sky... Remus and Sirius angst. Mild slash.


A/N:

Just a little drabble, full of angst and other nice things. Hope you enjoy it. :D

Cheerio,

MK

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Warnings: Slash! Remus/Sirius pairing.

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When we were younger, he would whisper sweet promises into my ear as we lay under the moonless sky. _He would never leave me. Never hurt me. Always love me. I was his only_. At first, a dark doubt would sweep into my mind, leaving me to wonder how many times he had said those words before, holding some girl, or worse, another boy, and lying under the stars. Though one look at his reassuring smile, and those thoughts would dissolve away.

After Hogwarts, we moved in together, sharing my old, family cottage, which happened to be far enough from civilization to guarantee no one would hear the wolf on full moons or other things on any other night. We could hardly keep our hands off of each other, and couldn't get enough of each other. Every night after we made love, he would hold me close, whispering those sweet promises. _He would never leave me. Never hurt me. Always love me. I was his only._ I would foolishly snuggle even closer, wishing time would stretch on and leave us behind.

Lily and James' wedding came, bringing with it a inescapable euphoria. Their marriage seemed to only strengthen our bond. As the they had stood at the alter, reciting their vows, he locked eyes with me, mouthing his sweet promises. _He would never leave me. Never hurt me. Always love me. I was his only._ As far as I was concerned, our own joining had already taken place. A ceremony that didn't require rings, priests, and especially white, itchy dresses. It had only needed two souls, willful and in love.

Soon, darker times came upon us. The assumption that Voldemort's steadily increasing power would fade just as quickly as it had risen vanished. He passed through the wizarding world like a plague, infecting everything in his path. The Dark Mark became more ominous than the Grim, burning into the sky over the carnage like acid and staining willing arms like ink on parchment. Those nights of making love, laying close, and sweet promises became few. We were all doing our share of work with the Order. He became an auror, like I would have had I not been what I was. His nights were late, leaving me to my research and lonely, sometimes jealous thoughts. On some few nights, when he came home later than necessary, the stench of alcohol would be strong on his breath and the smell of a heavy perfume wafted from his person. It was enough to make me gag, yet he would slip in beside me, believing me to be asleep, and whisper those sweet promises into my ear before drifting off into a drunken slumber. _He would never leave me. Never hurt me. Always love me. I was his only._

Lily became pregnant, and in a flash everything seemed to go wrong. Those few late nights became many when Voldemort decided to come after our friends. Dumbledore decided they needed more protection after Harry was born. When the Fidelius Charm was chosen, I knew I would never be their Secret-Keeper. After all, I was a dark creature. Of course, it would be only natural for him, James's best friend and Harry's godfather, to be the one, and with that choice, I knew things would never be the same. It became an excuse not to see me. He would have to protect Lily, James, and Harry. He couldn't risk staying with me. I accepted it. I knew it would be considered selfish to ask Lily and James to pick someone else, and I knew he would be disgusted with me at the idea. Peter had offered several times, but it went unheard, and soon he left our cottage to protect them, taking his sweet promises with him.

Then that night came, the one the rest of the wizarding world celebrated, leaving me to morn everything I had lost with raw disbelief. He had betrayed us all. James... Lily... Harry... Peter... And me. His promises had meant nothing, empty and heartless, yet said with such convincing fidelity. In the end, they were all I had left. At night as I lay down, I still hear him, and I remember all those years ago, when we were young and carefree, lying under the moon less sky, and he would whisper those sweet promises into...

_He would never leave me. Never hurt me. Always love me. I was his only._


End file.
